if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
