so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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