There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
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