I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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