3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
he fucked my hip out of place.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize
