But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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