I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize