Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
two words: eviction party
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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