You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
