i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
