are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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