Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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