just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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