Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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