what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
