I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
