so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
