Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Say something about gay babies.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
