Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I think a kid would responsible me up
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
