Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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