Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
