Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
