She said her name was "party"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
soo... how was my night?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
