i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
