Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
