We're facebook friends in real life
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
There are leaves in my underwear?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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