She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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