their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Randomize
