Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
