is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
