i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
