yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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