ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
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