I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
So squirting runs in the family.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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