The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize
