It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
