I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i just google imaged poop.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Randomize