do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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