Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
