So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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