My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
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