In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize