tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
