See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
