She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I need to calm my uterus...
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
