i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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