We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
