maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
