she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
