OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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