do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
