do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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