Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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